JAMES SCHUYLER

"This Dark Apartment"

____________________

Coming from the deli

a block away today I

saw the UN building

shine and in all the

months and years I’ve

lived in this apartment

I took so you and I

would have a place to

meet I never notice

that it was in my view.

I remember very well

the morning I walked in

and found you in bed

with X. He dressed

and left. You dressed

too. I said, “Stay

five minutes.” You

did. You said, “That’s

the way it is.” It

was not much of a surprise.

Then X got on speed

and ripped off an

antique closet and an

air conditioner, etc.

After he was gone and

you had changed the

Segal lock, I asked

you on the phone, “Can’t

you be content with

your wife and me?” “I’m

not built that way”,

you said. No surprise.

Now, without saying

why, you’ve let me go.

You don’t return my

calls, who used to call

me almost every evening

when I lived in the coun-

try. “Hasn’t he told you

why?” “No, and I doubt he

ever will.” Goodbye. It’s

mysterious and frustrating.

How I wish you would come

back! I could tell

you how, when I lived

on East 49th, first

with Frank and then with John,

we had a lovely view of

the UN building and the

Beekman Towers. They were

not my lovers, though,

You were. You said so.